Something Old. Something New. Something Borrowed. Something Red White and Blue?

Break out the fireworks and bikinis!

Are you busy getting ready for a great backyard BBQ or are you confirming hair appointments and picking up your bridesmaid dress from the tailor for the upcoming weekend?

As we get ready for the 4th of July festivities, Bridelines wonders...holiday weekend weddings: a great way to have extra time to celebrate or a guarantee that your friends will be angry at you for ruining their beach getaway?

The ongoing debate about holiday weekend weddings (especially in the summer) will likely never be solved. For the bride and groom it’s a chance to have out of town guests relax and arrive with time to spare, for the guests it’s decidedly more of a conundrum. Some people are delighted to receive an invitation especially for a destination wedding over a holiday weekend; others cringe at the thought of having to take one of their few designated work holidays to celebrate anything other than not having to go to the office. Unfortunately, for the bride, the majority of our readers identify with the latter.

If you are one of the brides who decided to have a Memorial Day, Independence Day, or Labor Day weekend wedding, you are probably aware that your guests will have mixed emotions.

Think about how you would react to having to trade in margaritas by the pool and flip flops for fancy toasts and high heels. As we recommend for any bride, be considerate! The holiday weekend bride needs to be even more so. If you are having a destination wedding, your guests will still get to enjoy the weekend away and as a bonus get to attend a great party. If you are having your wedding on the Saturday or Sunday of the weekend, do not expect your friends to attend multiple other events (rehearsal dinners, brunches, etc).

Also, keep in mind that things tend to be more expensive around holidays. Try to keep costs down in other areas, because there is no doubt that guests will be spending more money (and time sitting in traffic) to attend your big day. We are not condemning holiday weekend brides, only a gentle reminder to be aware that having to go to a holiday weekend wedding for some is like having to work on Labor Day. It just feels wrong.

Keep in mind, this weekend is Independence Day…..a celebration of liberation and freedom….does wearing Spanx and catering to the bride really fit in with the theme? We leave it to you to decide!

Tell us your comments by posting below and visit the discussion on Bridal Tweet!

http://www.bridaltweet.com/forum/topics/holiday-weekend-wedding-whats

What Happens in Vegas...Wedding Style

Who Doesn't Love a Vegas Wedding?

Everyone loves a Vegas wedding except maybe Rachel and Ross or that guy who lost his tooth in The Hangover. Last weekend was my first Vegas experience. It shouldn't have taken 28 years to get there, but don't worry, I managed to book the wrong flight and ended up there a day early-gambling, eating, shopping and stalking brides...all by myself.

This post is dedicated to all the Vegas brides who are getting married this summer. Congratulations.

We snapped some photos (thank you Dani) and we want you to tell us your opinion on these dresses. Honesty is the only policy on Bridelines, so give us your honest opinions of the good, the bad, the plain ridiculous.

Love the short dress and love the romantic back ground....

Pictures in the Bellagio garden. What do you think of the bold red flowers?

A boat ride through Venice to start off the evening...

What do you think of the open back with lace?

Speechless...or priceless?

Some Exciting Bridelines News!

We are so excited to be part of the new Weddzilla Blog team!

We will be sharing our practical, funny and honest opinions on bridesmaids, bridezillas and everything in between. Check out our introduction!

http://blog.weddzilla.com/2009/06/introducing-new-featured-bloggers-jill.html

Please vote for Bridelines as Wedding Channel's Best Bridal Blog!
Click the link below and reply to the thread. Attach your favorite Bridelines post!

http://bit.ly/YjYg3

Thanks to all our readers for being so supportive!

To Remaining Friends During All The I Do's,

Jill and Lauren

Guests Lists: Who Makes the Cut?

Even before you were engaged chances are you and your soon to be fiancé had conversations (maybe many conversations) about what your wedding would be like. Most likely you even previously drafted a tentative guest list on some scrap piece of paper on one drunken evening. When it comes to weddings, we all know size DOES matter. Big, small, in between? Whatever your expectations were, we can guarantee that by the time you have integrated your list with your parents and in-laws it will be significantly longer than you anticipated.

When you initially thought you would invite the girl who sits in the cubicle next to you at work, you were wrong. When you thought of course you would invite your hairdresser, again you were wrong. When you’re finance was certain he was inviting the guy he rides on the train with every morning…he too was wrong. These are the concessions you make because you instead will have to invite Mr. & Mrs. Goldfarb (a colleague of your father’s that you've never met) and your third cousin Sandy who you last saw at your own Christening.

How do you logically cut the list down to make room for the people you want to invite, without hurting anyone’s feelings or alienating family members?

Here are a few pointers. To make a large cut, eliminate an entire group of people. For instance….your friend’s parents. Even though you have known a lot of these people for years….if you invite some you have to invite all. This is an easy way to cut twenty to thirty people off of your list at one time (and unless you still see them frequently, they will understand).

Another easy fix is to eliminate the 'plus one'. Yes some of your friends will be offended to not be invited with a date, but considering you are paying per plate you do not have to pay for some guy that your friend hooked up with once two years ago to eat filet mignon.

Here is a rule of thumb to consider: If you have not seen, spoken to or received an email from someone in more than a year....you do not need to invite them to your wedding.

If all else fails, elope! Just think of all the money you'll save....and you know you've always secretly wanted to be married by Elvis in Vegas anyway!

Rule #1: Never Leave a Fellow Crasher Behind

As we go through various life events we are given rules how to best approach each situation. We are told the simple recipes for getting a date, landing a job, losing weight. We are told from a young age that if we follow these rules we are doing the “right” thing.

However, there are no rules for wedding events and what is right and wrong usually depends on the brides hormones…which for most brides has more highs and lows than Britney’s career.

Our readers have asked...
“My friend is having an out-of-town shower, do I have to attend?”
“The bachelorette party is really expensive, do I have to go?”
“My friend is having 2 engagement parties, do I have to attend both?”

While we cannot say that our opinions at Bridelines are the end all of bridal opinions (although we'd like to think they are), we will give you our best advice. If you are a bridesmaid, you are expected to conform to certain bridesmaid standards, i.e. attending events, pretending to be really excited for every single of them, being emotionally and mentally supportive of bridal decisions and creating an artistic hat made out of wrapping paper.

However, the economy is awful and many people are out of jobs. We don’t all live in the same states. We think brides need to understand that their friends love them and want to attend everything, but sometimes it’s just unrealistic and too expensive. Please do not get mad at your friends for not attending things—if they have a good reason. The wedding is a must…but maybe the only must. If your bridesmaids are flying in for a wedding and attending a bachelorette party, they should get a pass on the shower. Brides, we know you want your friends there, so maybe they can be there via Skype.

Bachelorette parties are usually more fun than showers (sorry moms), so if your bridesmaids are choosing one, we suggest choosing the bach party. However, people who aren’t in your wedding party should feel NO obligation to spend the money to attend. We can all agree that large groups of girls are loud and overwhelming and these events usually go over better when you don’t invite every female on your guest list.

Friends, a cute thing to do is to send something to the event if you cannot attend. Send a bottle of champagne to the bachelorette dinner. Send flowers to the bridal shower. It will only take 10 minutes out of your life, and will make the bride really happy and show her that you are thinking about her during these special moments.

Moral of the story is…there is no “right” thing to do. High expectations only cause let-downs. Brides, don’t start fights with your friends…you’ve got enough fighting to do with your fiancé over invitations and with your mother-in-law over flowers.

Everyone has their own opinion of proper wedding protocol, so use your best judgment. If you know the bride really wants you to attend her bachelorette party, try and find a way. If you can’t…you can’t. If you do not have good judgment (some people just don’t), you can always
email us and we will give you our best advice.

Bridelines will help you maintain your friendship and manage expectations during
all these crazy wedding events!

Please send in any other questions about what is proper wedding protocol…

Wearing Chucks to the altar? Time to alter your plans.

Some words from another male guest blogger...

I admit it. I love Converse Chuck Taylors, which have variously been called Chucks or Chuck Ts or even Cons over the years. I remember buying my first pair when I was in junior high – a maroon canvas pair of size 9s – and proudly wearing them around my school in deference to the Ramones and the Clash and all the other cool bands that sported those throwback kicks. Since then I’ve probably owned 25-30 pairs (unfortunately their thin soles wear out rather quickly) and I will certainly buy more down the road. I’ve owned blue ones, red ones, black and yellow ones, silver lame ones, stars-and-stripes ones, and a pair that has flames screened onto the sides.

Needless to say, I’m a fan of Chucks, and I’ve worn them pretty much everywhere in the last 30 years. To school. To work. On job interviews (I’m in advertising, so it’s expected that we’re a bit odd). On camping trips. Even to my college graduation. I certainly don’t wear them all the time, and I find I wear them less than I used to, but they will always have a welcome home in my closet.

But I will never, ever wear Chucks at my wedding, and nobody else should, either. I know that’s a strong statement, but it’s how I feel, and for good reason.

Back in the day, some grooms would buy a brand new pair of Chucks for their wedding day – often matching it with their tie/cummerbund combo – and don it with their tux as a way to display their rebellious spirit and individuality. A pair of Chucks peeking out under your tuxedo pants said, “Hey, I might be getting married, but I’m still my own guy, and I although I take this day seriously, I want to add a dash of whimsy to show that I’m not as stuffy as this tux seems to make me.”

This is all completely understandable, and at one time commendable. Because back in the day, unless you were a complete hippie/Deadhead or a dyed-in-the-wool iconoclast, weddings were more formal affairs where guys wore suits and tuxes and women wore formal dresses … in other words, a step above your normal church clothes and akin to what you may have worn to your prom. Wearing Chucks was that one little statement you could make that told people you were embracing this institution (i.e., marriage) with your personality and sense of humor intact.

But now, there is really no such thing as proper wedding attire. Some still opt for the more formal tux/gown thing, but many other engaged couples are dressing things down considerably, and even others are doing themed weddings. I’ve seen Star Trek and Shrek theme wedding photos online that were as scary as they were funny, but I still have to hand it to these folks for having the cojones to express themselves regardless of the jibes they probably continue to receive.

Which brings me to my beloved Chucks. Because it’s completely acceptable now to wear whatever you want at your wedding, wearing Chucks with a tux is no longer an expression of individuality and whimsy; it’s a cliché and shows a lack of imagination. It says “I didn’t have the time to actually think about how I wanted to inject my personality into this wedding, so I went with what everyone else has done for the last 30 years.”

There are thousands upon thousands of ways you can put your groom outfit together to express yourself. I’m getting married on a beach in November (how’s that for casual), and I’m going down the aisle in a fresh, tasteful linen shirt and shorts, capped off with new Reef leather sandals. It matches the setting, my feeling about myself and the mood I want to set for the day – relaxed, causal and fun. And even if you are doing a church wedding that’s a tad bit more formal, tans and pastels, regular ties and more causal suits are becoming much more fashionable for grooms.

So, guys, before you default on a black tux and Chucks for your wedding day, think of all the other ways you can be yourself.

Your bride will thank you.

About the blogger
Our guest blogger Jeff has his own wedding blog called Groomasaurus http://groomasaurus.com, which offers a groom’s take on planning a wedding, and he is also co-owner of My Wedding Workbook, http://www.myweddingworkbook.com/ a free online wedding planning toolkit that helps engaged couples manage all their wedding details.

Rehearsal Dinners - The Kickoff Event

It’s the day before your wedding and despite feeling anxious and nauseous, you prepare yourself for the biggest pre-game event of your life thus far…..the Rehearsal Dinner. Rehearsal Dinners are more like the kickoff to the wedding weekend than an actual chance to rehearse for the wedding. I mean, once you’ve seen one wedding you’ve seen them all….walk down the aisle, try not to trip and stand for an hour while vows are engaged and tears are shed. It’s not that complicated.

If rehearsal dinners are intended for people to rehearse getting drunk for the actual event, then I think we have succeeded. We have seen more drunk people at events leading up to the wedding than at the actual wedding.

Traditionally, the pre wedding dinner is a chance for the groom’s parents to throw a party for the betrothed and their closest friends and families. But often times the event becomes too large and overdone, making the wedding almost anticlimactic. If you are having a big wedding you do not need a pre party the size of Madonna’s pre-Oscar party. Of course you need to do something, especially for out of town guests and your bridal party, but it does not need to include the entire guest list. Do you really want your friends already exhausted by the time you say ‘I do’?

The most successful rehearsal dinners are the ones which are small, understated and end early. As the bride you want to make sure that you are in bed early the night before (even if you stay up watching reruns of John and Kate Plus 8 because you can’t sleep). Do not for one second consider ‘going out after’ the party. We don’t need to tell you why that’s a bad idea.

Enjoy your Rehearsal Dinner; listen to your friends give speeches about you, have a glass of wine, eat the food (because you won’t at the wedding) and then say goodnight….and go home! Enough said!!!

Save the Dates: Smile for the Magnet!

What would my fridge be without all your Save the Dates?

Save the Dates are yet another way for the wedding industry to make money off of innocent brides and grooms. The practical purpose behind Save the Dates is for your guests to know ahead of time when your wedding is so they can revolve their entire years’ plans around that date. This concept makes sense for weddings where you have out of town guests because they need hotel information and need to make plans in advance, but other than that...what is really the point?

If you are my friend who is important enough to make the A-list, and you live locally, can’t you remember my wedding date without having to see my face on a magnet every morning before you eat your Special K? Can’t my aunt remember this date if she remembers to send me birthday cards every year? If someone can’t remember your (most important day of your life that you've been dreaming about since age 6) wedding date, do you really need them there?

All these people who receive your Save the Dates found their way to your communion/bar mitzvah, high school graduation party and even your engagement party without being notified in advance. We are pretty sure they will find the way to your wedding, even if its only because of the open bar and sushi during cocktail hour.

Ok…since we aren’t going to convince the entire industry to be rid of Save the Dates, instead we advise to either keep it simple or on the other end, get really creative. There’s nothing worse than thinking you are sending something smart and creative and everyone is making fun of you behind your back because they've seen it done so many times. Spend some time and think of a creative way to announce your wedding date – something that cannot be easily found on google.

If you aren’t creative, keep it simple. Send a simple small card with the important details. Something simple and classy always works in these situations. Also, if you are going to send something, a great idea is to go green and not harm the environment.

This site has all things green.

http://www.mmmpaper.com/green.html

Now to make the brides happy and because we know you spent hours going through pictures for your magnet and choosing the exact wording, we will proudly hang your Save the Dates on the fridge (or at least make sure it’s there when you come over…)

Tell us the creative Save the Dates you’ve received.
Email save the dates – trendy or tacky?

Texas Tuxedo to Top Hat and Tails

Why is there so much drama when choosing bridesmaid dresses? Bridelines discusses this issue on Onewed.

Check it out at: http://bit.ly/We7Xy

Now onto another important question - What is the deal with dress codes?

Black tie, black tie optional, festive attire, cocktail attire…..do any of these ring a bell?

When reading a wedding invitation, after the "please join us as we become Mr. and Mrs. at so and so country club at a given time in a given month" if your eyes travel down to the bottom right corner of the page there is most likely an instruction on how to dress. Attire for weddings is dependent on many factors, including time of year, time of day and mostly the bride’s overall vision of her wedding day (or in many cases, her mother’s vision).

Does the bride want her groom to be waiting for her at the altar in a top hat and tails, with seven matching penguins at his side? Or should he be in Khaki pants, a blue shirt and a Navy blazer to mimic the sailboats that are conveniently placed in the harbor directly behind him?

After you have decided the general vibe of your wedding, as mistress of ceremonies you get to mandate a dress code to the entire guest list!

Just make sure that you don’t confuse your guests.

If you want them to wear jeans…say wear jeans…if you want them in Black tie….say Black tie.

For once this is an issue that is seemingly more complicated for men than women. Hey, we may have more difficulty picking out dresses and clearly we spend way more money…but when it comes to attire the rules are generally more flexible for the ladies.

Black tie optional is like giving a child a choice of wearing a coat to school in April or not. Just as the child would rather freeze to death than wear a jacket, a man would rather just wear a suit he owns, rather than have to rent a tux for one event. So if you want men in tuxedos, just say black tie and then they will have no choice.

The whole attire issue gets muddled when things like Urban Chic or Cocktail Attire come into play. Does that mean a man can wear a suit with no tie? Does it mean a woman can wear a short or long dress?

Answering these riddles can be as painstaking as trying to spell the words on the National Spelling Bee. So let’s just call it a draw. If your invitation is hard to decipher then expect people to show up in a variety of outfits and don’t worry about it. But if you want your wedding to look like the Oscars…make sure you are clear an concise about your desires….or your crazy Uncle Larry may end up wearing a Hawaiian shirt and shorts to your Casual Chic wedding.

Honeymoon Planning Made Easy

What is the best part of wedding planning?

We know, it’s lovely to be able to begin your life with your special someone and declare your love in front of all your friends and family, but really, we all know the best part is the honeymoon.

What could be better than a 2 week vacation, expenses paid by all those guests whose names you don’t remember?

Another wonderful thing about your honeymoon is that planning it can be fun. If you aren't the vacation planning type, give the task to your guy. While you are deciding between yellow roses or orchids, your fiancé can be planning your trip, organizing your meals and calling hotels, telling them to cover the bed in roses.

To help with your honeymoon planning, we wanted to share a really cool website.

Our friends at http://www.onewed.com/ recently launched its interactive Honeymoon and Destination Wedding planning page. From destination wedding planning to adventurous honeymoon excursions, OneWed's newest resource can provide planning advice for every budget. With the launch of this new planning page, couples now access top honeymoon and destination wedding planning tools at their fingertips.

http://www.onewed.com/honeymoon-destination-wedding/